COMRADES, what did I say last year about some foolish strong-headed woman's dream of forming and running viable political parties? I laughed when I heard that this is what was happening, and I warned that in no time, the outfit would be falling into smithereens … it has not even taken a year for this prophesy to come to pass. Being a veteran politician that I am, I did not need anyone to tell me that this whole project was a joke.
When people see those of us who are experienced in this field, they look at themselves in the mirror and start telling and convincing themselves that they can be good leaders … they think that this is something that each and every goat and pig can do as well … until they have embarrassed themselves.
Sometimes I really don't understand why these people never learn from a myriad of examples right before their noses.
Well, I agree with those that say foolishness thinks it can cure itself!
When we tell these people that being a leader is a gift that one is born with, they think we are trying to crowd them out of the race for leadership… that we are trying to erect a high wall to keep them out of power, when in fact, we would simply be trying to be kind as to try and serve them from embarrassing themselves.
Thankfully, there are quite many who listened to my words of advice and did not join in the madness… the humble likes of Cde Webster, Nicholas and others who know their limits in life and have since benefited from their patience after the people decided to forgive them.
But there are those that went around hauling insults. Now that things are not turning out to be what they hoped they would be, they cannot even dare make overtures to return to the party. That is what happens when people are foolish enough as to burn bridges.
Well, as a devout Christian, I cannot be seen to be rejoicing at the misfortunes of others - even where the misfortunes are self-made - ignorance is also another form of disability. Our sages say seka urema wafa.
Cdes, I am quite happy with reports that I am getting suggesting that preparations for the 21st February Movement are going on smoothly… and that there is actually a stampede by well wishers to generously donate towards this worthy cause.
We should all get ready for the mother of all celebrations… a celebration that will make those untiring detractors of ours green with envy.
… AND CZ'S NOTEBOOK
Dr CZ is very happy about what is happening in the Zimbabwe People First party. Ever since those opportunists started coming together to present themselves as a better alternative to what is already there, some of us realised that this was yet another fraud. Why would someone who has benefitted from abusing Zimbos for more than three decades and is now in the twilight of his political career, like in the case of Didymus Mutasa, wait to be violently chased out of the ruling party in order for them to know what is best for Zimbos?
Now that the project is sinking in sewer water, we should be happy that these men and women can now happily join us in breathing the air that they fouled when they were on the other side of the rainbow. God is always fair.
If these people had started fighting over issues to do with the welfare of Zimbos, we would have thought of them differently than in this case in which they are fighting for power and personal glory.
It is good that the project has collapsed before it has further confused an already confused electorate.
Good riddance to bad rubbish!
Dr CZ thinks it is high time his brother, Cde George Mlilo, who is currently the permanent secretary in the ministry of Local Government and National Housing, upgraded himself to a full-blown politician.
The brother - who made his name by being a pig farmer in Bulawayo - has all the qualities of a viable and credible politician.
Of late he has been waffling a lot in-between insulting valid court orders at each and every turn. Only this week, he decided to tell Zimbos what they would want to hear… that the cure-all Zimbabwe Agenda for Sustainable Socio-Economic Transformation (Zim-Asset) was working wonders. According to Cde Mlilo, the government has so far delivered more than 100 000 of the 300 000 housing units threatened under Zim-Asset.
Dear merciful fans, please do not be cruel as to ask Dr CZ where you can locate and physically count these houses! Just believe it because Cde Mlilo told us that the houses have been delivered and that the remaining 200 000 are at various stages of construction! Just believe it because Cde Mlilo has said so!
Cde Mlilo has all the ingredients of a successful politician… he can certainly give the likes of Cde Joseph Made, Cde Chris Mushowe, Cde Supa Mandiwanzira and others a very good run for their money!
As the preparations for the 21st February Movement gather momentum, Matobo North legislator, Cde Never Khanye, who is a member of the organising committee, was quoted in the official media as saying the party was planning to get 150 cattle to feed the estimated 100 000 guests expected to attend the event.
Now can someone read the following statement from Cde Khanye?
"We have set a target to raise 150 cattle for the event, we are appealing to well-wishers to do so willingly and not to come again tomorrow and say we were forced. All A2 farmers who got offer letters must donate a beast each for this event and those that will fail we will take it that they don't appreciate what the President has done for them!"
He went on to say they had put strict measures to stop "unscrupulous party members from fleecing business people and prospective donors using the party's name".
Should Dr CZ say more? Everything explains itself and is clearly-worded, isn't it?
Dr CZ can't believe this one. Information reaching him is to the effect that the powers-that-be have, in their accustomed wisdom, decided to unleash another Statutory Instrument (SI)… this time SI 21 of 2017 that gives them the power to jail for one year, anyone found using a conventional light bulb!
One good year behind bars because of a light bulb! Ya-ah, small wonder why this has often been referred to as a country-and-a-half!
Meanwhile, what could have happened to real criminals… like those of Dr CZ's brothers and sisters who are responsible for the disappearance of diamond gems worth northwards of US$15 billion? George Orwell was right when he said some animals are more equal than others!
Last, but not least, a CZ fan says remember this February has four Sundays, four Mondays, four Tuesdays, four Wednesdays, four Thursdays, four Fridays and four Saturdays.
This happens once every 823 years. Being someone who never did Maths beyond the basics to enable him to count money and other things that matter in life, Dr CZ cannot vouch for the veracity of this claim. In the event that this is true, then this means Dr CZ and his fans are part of that truly blessed generation.
Let this show on the ground with our firstname.lastname@example.org